I awoke in my hospital bed 38 years ago after having had a Caesarean Section, realising that I had had an unbelievable experience.

I was stunned. I knew it had happened.

Unfortunately, though I tried to keep the memory of the experience alive, details have been forgotten over the years.

I remember flying at great speed down a spiral tunnel with a noise like a siren "oing-oing-oing," rising and falling. I think it was at the end of the tunnel I suddenly began to feel unbearable pain. I couldn't get out of it. I think I pleaded with God to take it away. Just at the point where, with horror, I realised I would not be able to take any more, I was in a bright white light. I knew I was in the presence of God.  I saw no landscape or people, just the light and an overwhelming sense of peace, love and unity. Everything made sense and I felt every atom of myself being loved. It was ecstasy. I realised that this had absolutely nothing to do with religion which was inapplicable. 

Now I think I was then in a kind of purgatory, though words are useless.

I was so sorry when I woke. I have often tried to recreate the details through meditation. I no longer fear death; I look forward to being with God again. I tried to tell my husband about it but he appeared not to be paying much attention. Words are totally inadequate and inappropriate.  Years later I was talking about it to some very spiritual friends who live in a community in the north of Scotland. Later my husband asked me why I had never told him about it. I said...because I thought you would find it embarrassing. He replied that I was right. Other people really did not want to hear so I stopped telling anyone. There was no knowledge or talk of NDE's then. 

A few years ago I was very ill with cancer, but I recovered with surgery and treatment ...all I did was thank God for sparing me. 

I wonder about life and death daily. I believe love is what it is all about and I try hard to love everyone, especially those I really don't like. I pray every time I think of it, several times a day. I pray for everyone and for the world. 

I am so privileged to have had an NDE, but it has taken me years to begin to understand what life is really about; it is such a mystery.