(English translation of dream from 10th of February 23)

I had the following dream today:

I know, we have gathered as a family for a family reunion.
I know, we are somewhere at a bright, white, hotel, radiating, shining, we all are gathered around a big room with a huge round table.

Suddenly I hear from someone next to me that my husband Herbie left the meeting because he didn't feel well. And I notice, his seat next to me is free.
The family (my kids, his kids, our relatives) don’t find anything strange about it... they chat casually. John - my husband’s eldest son - leads the conversation.

I find this happening strange, it’s unusual, my husband leaves without saying a word, it makes my heart tighten.

I wonder what he is up to.

I wonder, why he left without saying goodbye, what is going on here? Is he unwell? Sick? So suddenly?

And ... thoughts come into my mind - like: How am I supposed to get home with my daughter Daniela (15 1/2) without him? Normally he is the driver; did he take the car to drive home? Panic occurs within me for a bit... I consider several options.

Then I have severe shortness of breath.
I can not swallow.
I apologize, I get up from the table, where all remain calm and free of worry…
I go to our hotel room.
Herbert's daughter Carmen brings tea. We are a patchwork family, we go along very well.
Daniela (my daughter) laughs at the idea, I got a wonderful tea as a gift.
It is a special tea, I did not know it existed. I tell Carmen and give thanks.
Carmen leaves the room.
Dani goes to the bathroom next to me.

I stand right by the bed and feel for my necklaces (I touch them).
There are 3:
One with an emerald stone, one with a cross symbol, the 3rd I did not recognize.

Then I hear clearly the word: “FEEL!“ - from someone right next to me on my right side. Wow. Such a clear, strong word. Calm, clear, persistent.
I still think to myself, what should I feel? There is nothing to feel?!

And then - I feel very clearly a force that embraces me from behind, I have goose bumps, a tingling feeling in my whole body especially from my back side… and I remember, it is stronger than the feeling I had already had once while riding a motorcycle (!) when I prayed for support to be guided safely through the traffic.
As I said, I already had such a feeling one time, softer, gentle.
... I feel how the energy lifts me (easily!) up and I am surprised - I feel like I instantly can breathe much easier, like 10 times easier than normal… it’s amazing and happens so quickly, how this loving energy pushes me through the space, through the wall, through the left corner in my room - without hesitation and without any feeling of limitation... I give myself completely to this supporting energy = I know this is a loving and supporting being. I fully and trustingly relax.

It went, and goes so easily, so simple... I am fascinated and sooo grateful.
It’s space, universe, colors, … then

I wake up and am still breathing easily and somehow with expanded state I say: Thank you, thank you, thank you , Thank you ....
for this experience…

I am now awake and start to type down this and share it with our family and my husband….
I thought, this is calming us down and helpful in the heavy energy we were in, not knowing what would happen… it was my dream/more real than real … 12 days before my husband transitioned… this I realized later.

My husband talked about his heartbeat, about a choir he heard, about his mum and waving his arm ecstatically to the right corner (seing his mum, who already went across the veil years before my husband).

I'm still so grateful for my husband allowing me to stay with him. I say, it was his gift to me to let me stay close to him, it helps me now to "survive" and focus on my life. I still have work to do, I guess. He trusted my experience ( I've worked at General hospital Vienna for 30 years now)... I wrote a lot to stay calm and give him quiet space... it happened so quickly, less than a month. Time to say good bye to the family, kids, some friends, some colleagues. 

I miss my husband deeply, and I know he is still around us as energy, sending siigns and messages, helping us forward. 
He was humorous and loved to be a teacher ... he still is a "teacher" to me, to move on, to get up and do good in the world. Bless him, bless you, the work you do. Thank you, allowing me to share.